|So this is your wife, eh? No! Atsa my camel.
|Don't you know what duplicates are? Sure, those five kids up in Canada. Well, I wouldn't know about that. I haven't been in Canada in years.
|Now here is a little peninsula, and...eh...here is a viaduct leading over to the mainland. Why a Duck? I'm alright. How are you?
|Two fried eggs, two poached eggs, two scrambled eggs, and two medium-boiled eggs. And two hard-boiled eggs. And two hard-boiled eggs. Honk! Make that three hard-boiled eggs. Honk! And one duck egg.
|Atsa fish! I no wanna the fish! No fish!
|You got any insurance? What? Are you insured?! No, sir. Well, then you're just the fellow I wanna see. I have here an accident policy that'll absolutely protect you, no matter what happens. If you lose a leg, then we'll help you look for it. And all this will cost you is...eh...what've you got there? A dollar? One dollar. Here you are.
|If we're successful in disposing of these lots, I'll give you a nice commission. And..eh..How 'bouta some money? Well, you can have your choice.
|How much would you want to run into an open manhole? Just the cover charge. Well, drop in sometime. Sewer. Well, we cleaned that up pretty well.
|When the crowd gathers 'round, I want you to mingle with 'em...Don't pick their pockets, just mingle with 'em, and... I'll find time for both. Well, maybe we'll cut out the auction.
|Now listen to me...I'm not gonna have that redheaded fellow running around in the lobby. If you wanna keep him up in your room, you'll have to keep him in a trap. You can't catch him. Who is he?" Chico: "Atsa my partner, but he no speak. Oh, that's your silent partner.
|The party of the second part shall be known in this contract as, The party of the second part. I no like-a the second party either. Well, you should've come to the first party...we didn't get home 'til around four in the morning. I was blind for three days.
|Oh, Signor Pastrami...What is the first number? Number one!
|How is it you never got double pneumonia? I go 'round by myself.
|You remember me; Prince of Wales... Knock-knock-knock! Who is it? It's me, the King of England. My father! Knock-knock-knock-ring-slam!
|It's alright, that's in every contract! That's what they call the 'Sanity Clause. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. You can't fool me...there ain't no Sanity Clause. Well, you win the white carnation.
|Hey doc! Can you see us? If I can't, there's something wrong with my glasses.
|Getta your tootsie-frootsie ice cream!
|I'm getting a fine tootsie-frootsieing right here.
|Sunup is the worst horse on the track. I notice he wins all the time. Well that's just because he comes in first.
|One dollar and you'll remember me all your life. That's the most nauseating proposition I ever had.
|Hello boss! What're you doing here? Well, this makes it a perfect voyage...I'm terribly sorry, but I thought this was my trunk. It is your trunk. I don't remember packing you boys.
|Two beers, bartender. I'll take two beers too.
|Where can I find you? Don't worry...wherever you are, you'll find us. No, I'm sick of that. Let's meet somewhere else.
|Groucho: What is it? Chico: General Smith reports a gas attack. He wants to know what to do. Groucho: Tell him to take a teaspoon full of bicarbonate of soda and a half a glass of water. Chico: Yes sir.